First weekend in full isolation: biking the Pitt Meadows dyke trail
We're nearly through our second full week of isolation, some of you maybe longer, and we're all trying to figure out a new normal.
School been cancelled for the rest of the final term albeit (amazing) teachers are figuring out daily online connections/lessons, a lot of people are working from home full-time while watching those now-at-home kids--who are getting stir-crazy, and just about everything has been cancelled that has Spring or early Summer dates, along with possible looming financial stress that you or your family may be experiencing, or physical stress if you're an essential worker or working two jobs at once.
It's. A. Lot.
I have been wavering from excitement over all the cancelled plans (strong introvert) to feeling disappointed with cancellations of fun/social things that happen weekly or Big Things I'd been looking forward to for months to feeling stir-crazy and ready to take a drive By Myself. I've felt fairly lucky that our routine hasn't changed more than about 30%, and for that, I'm grateful. That doesn't make this whole situation any less weird.
When shit hits the fan, the first thing I do is make a plan. I'm an INTJ (or a 5) and the way I deal with drastic change is to try to control it with actionable items: put plans in place, embrace what routine is leftover, and execute. It's a modicum of control but it's also a way to help organize my restless helplessness and satisfy my need for doing something rather than wallowing or feeling pitiful, both of which I hate. I would rather choose to acknowledge my feelings of disappointment/anger/irritation/disbelief/etc. and then move on. It's just not helpful to stay in that place, for me, for an extended period of time. This entire situation is out of our control. Most lives have been turned completely upside down, and that is just really freaking hard.
Do you know how you deal with stress? Pay attention to it so you have that knowledge going forward and acknowledge what feeling you're trying to evade. Sit with it or move on but give yourself grace in whatever way you need to. Laugh at whatever craziness this has pandemic imposed on you or cry instead-both can be active emotional releases to help clear out some of that underlying stress.
Something that has helped us these past two weeks (see paragraph 4, for reference) is making a plan. There's two New Things on this plan:
1) all 3 of us go for a daily morning walk with the dog for about an hour
2) make a list of Things We Want to Learn/Make/Do for each person (yes, mine will obvs. have a few HAVE TOs on it, as well...don't think I'm gonna' let this time pass without showing my kids how to properly clean a toilet)
The walks give us a break from monotony, give us nature, fresh air, and exercise and The List helps us look forward to something. Sort of like a created purpose, even if it's small and seemingly insignificant. It's helping because it's there if we need it. We might do three in a day or we might not get to any. That's ok. We'll still continue seeing friends online, doing school like always, and chores, but when our minds and bodies are restless, we just have to go to the list and find something that could maybe be interesting for the next 15+ minutes.
I'm absolutely not telling anyone to do anything, I'm just relaying what has been working for us, with my specific personality and my age of kids. I see you, parents with kids 5 and under, and I salute you. It's okay to admit this would be and is the Absolute Worst. I'd probably stay outside half the day with a canister of lysol wipes just so they wouldn't wreck the house and then bribe them with a movie every single evening just to get a mental break before bed. You don't need anyone's permission to do this any certain way but your own.
We WILL see people again. There WILL be a day where we can hug our friends and family. We WILL be able to travel freely again. Your kids WILL be able to have playdates and you WILL have childcare and extended family dinners on holidays again. You WILL get through this.
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Over the coming weeks I plan to blog a bit more, but instead of overhauling every single list of things to do with your kids that are all over right now, I'm just going to edit it down to my favorite 3 each post. So, with that being said, here are a few links if you're interested:
A great resource Stress Reducing Activities for Anxious Kids - a lot of sensory things for kids to do in the meantime, when they get restless, bored, or anxious.
For when you just need 10 FREAKING MINUTES by yourself-- plop your kids (age 3-10ish) in front of this website and let them listen to great picture books sort of like you remember with Reading Rainbow.
If you are wanting more of the 'how will I do this day-to-day?", this can be a helpful resource.
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